Flowcharts

Flowcharts, baby. Yeah, those things your manager thinks makes you look productive while you’re actually just drawing a map of how chai gets cold in the Kolkata humidity.

So here’s the deal. A flowchart is basically a diagram where boxes and arrows pretend to know what the hell is going on. You follow arrows, you nod sagely, you pretend life has logic. But deep down, you know: that flowchart ends in the same place all of us do—stuck in traffic near Shyambazar.

Nodes? Fancy word for boxes. Different shapes mean different crap. Circle, square, diamond, hexagon—it’s like the geometry teacher everyone hated finally got a design job.

Imagine this: You wake up. That’s a circle. You brush teeth—oval box, because it’s routine, but you’re not thrilled. Then you go downstairs and see there’s no milk. That’s a diamond. Decision point. Do you boil water and cry, or go to the para grocery with exact change like a warrior? If you go outside, arrows point you to: A) Step over sleeping street dog, B) Get into shouting match over Rs. 2, C) Buy full cream, feel smug.

See? Flowchart.

More examples?

Different arrows? Of course. Some say “maybe,” some say “definitely,” and some just lie. It’s like listening to election promises:

Orientation? Kolkata-style. Top to bottom like the Ganges flows. Left to right like your dad’s handwriting across the newspaper.

Subgraphs? That’s just grouping your nonsense. Like calling the chaos of a Bengali wedding “logistics.”

Styling? Want your flowchart to look like Durga Puja pandal lighting? Knock yourself out:

And don’t forget the comments. You know, those sarcastic thoughts you had while making this? They go like this:

So next time someone asks you for a flowchart, don’t just diagram a server or a business process. Map out the path from Howrah to Gariahat during monsoon. That’s a real decision tree. And if they still don’t get it?

Tell them: “It’s like the metro line, but the signal always works.”

Flowcharts. Making chaos look organized since forever.